My Own Dan-inspired Tangent

I'll be honest: after I read that Dan's turtle was named Brian, my philosophical ponderings dropped with a thud and instead I focused on greater questions. Is it a nice turtle? Is it a snapping turtle? Does it menacing stalk around the terrarium until, realizing it craves Twizzlers sweetly ask: "Mom can we go to the store?" Does it eat no less than seven meals between 7 and 11PM? Does it like hip-hop?

I understand this may be my own Dan-inspired tangent, but I feel it is no less important than the naming of our literary empire or the inclusion of elite family members. On all things philosophical, I submit to my dear brothers to wrestle through those issues and decide. My vote is easily bought to break a tie.

Have a blessed Sunday!

Annie