The Metamorphic
Bluebill
Greg Elstad shot a Bluebill Duck one cold and windy day.
At least he
thot he did.
It came down hard—made quite a splash!—then in pristine
beauty lay
snow white belly gleaming in the setting sun’s last ray.
(The Bluebill is Greg’s favorite bird: the prey for which he’d
pray.)
Greg paddled out, picked up the duck, and saw with some
dismay
it had a
pointy beak!
“Now I’ve really gone astray.
This is not
a Bluebill. It’s a Fish Duck!
And a Fish Duck in my game bag is really NOT Okay!!”
What else COULD he say?
Greg paused there, thinking (while his Fish Duck
kept on stinking) what his hunting friends would bray:
“He’s lost
his mind!”
“He must be
blind!”
“He’s not
our kind!”
“At least, from now on he must pay
strict attention to the species of the ducks that fly his
way!”
Greg next thot, “Could I revive this duck so it could swim
away?”
But the duck
was far too dead for that.
Escape was not a game the duck could any longer play.
Greg’s remaining hope was to tuck his duck into the muck
So deep that it would stay.
That didn’t
work.
Up thru the muck the duck unstuck to resume its late array.
The only change? Now the duck was tinted gray.
At last, Greg had an inspiration!
“I’ll claim
I shot this Mergus* Duck for
public education!
I’ll have
it stuffed and write a plaque
AND PUT IT ON DISPLAY!!!”
*Actually Murgus
merganser americanus, more commonly known as the American Merganser.
Fred
He’s a big guy
6’, 2”
high.
His name is Fred.
Carol is the love of his life
And for 47
years, his wife.
Fred is smooth shaven; never furry.
Always laid
back; never in a hurry.
Retired printer; retired guard.
Even
working security he was never hard.
In High School Fred was a champion swimmer with local
acclaim.
Now Fred is a master fisherman with much local fame.
His sign
says it all:
“Fish tremble when they hear Fred’s name!”
Father of two, grandfather of three;
His
grandchildren get one dollar per day for free.
Most important: Fred is a devout Christian.
His
favorite saying:
“The best
is yet to come!”
—Greg
Elstad
