The Shelf Builder

Greg Elstad - brother, uncle - wrote this poem in 2010, a few years after his marriage to Lola.  In light of contemporary shelf-building in the brotherhood, it would seem appropriate to add it here.

The Shelf Builder

        by Greg Elstad

This house was once home to a Swede we called Stan,
     Content to live here with no shelf building plan.
Stan and wife "Bunny" lived here a long span,
     Loving each other the most two folks can.'

"We've plenty of shelf space!" they said after a scan.
     (But their shelves were all full when their marriage began!)
"Anything extra goes in the trash can!
     Or we'll give it to Goodwill wrapped up in Saran."

Bunny & Stan moved to town by their plan,
     They gave us this house since we're part of their clan.
They gave us their Chevy - a really nice van.
    (Now we're thinking of selling our trusty sedan!)

Most of their stuff they left here when they ran.
     The shelves were all full when our move in began.
We've crowded our stuff in as best as we can.
     Now Lola prays this, again  & again:

"Dear God in Heaven, please revamp my man,
     To one who builds shelves just as fast as he can.
Do this for me and I'll be Greg's best fan,
     I won't scare him stiff with my Shelf Empire Plan!

Please don't make Greg like those men from Iran!
     You know the type - they're a very dark tan,
They mutter a lot of a shelf building ban.
     (They base their beliefs on their prophet's Koran.)

Make Greg a man who builds shelves with elan,
     Good shelves!  Not cheap ones like those from Japan!
Shelves for my dishes, and boxesof bran,
     And one shelf for storing things kept in a pan!"

Postscript: My poem is complete.  But. . . .
I've still got 4 words to use ending with "an":
     The pie nut - the fattening but tasty pecan.
The Indian tribe, river, or city - Cheyenne.
     My niece & my nephwe - Ms. Ann(ie) & Dan.